Signing Bath

One of Jonah's newest signs is "bath." It amazes me that this child hated baths just a few months ago! Over the summer, we gradually had to introduce him into the pool and the bath tub. One day we would just fill the tub or pool and let him get used to the noise and the whole routine. Then another day we would encourage him to splash in the water. We took baby steps like this all the way until he would let us put him in the water.

Now, he absolutely loves bath time, and will even ask me for a bath! He will splash and play with his boats until the water is absolutely cold, and his hands and toes look like little raisins. Then he throws a fit when we take him out and drain the water. I am really looking forward to our family vacation in Florida this weekend, because the resort we are staying at has a nice pool. It will be too cold to go in the ocean yet, but I know Jonah will love the pool!

He does not yet understand the difference between a bath and the pool. When we look at pictures of him playing in the pool from the summer, he signs "bath." Today, he would not stop signing it, so I was glad he needed a bath anyway!

Here is a video of Jonah signing "Bath"

Eggsellent Activity!

Earlier this week, I had to go to the Target pharmacy to get Jonah's prescription filled for his ear infection. While we were waiting for the prescription, we took a peek in the dollar aisle. The dollar aisle at target often has fun little items that Jonah and I use for activities. I don't get anything from Target for saying this, I just want other Mommies to know that if you are looking for some new activities, Target usually has some things if you get creative.

This week, they have their Easter items out. Easter is on April 4th this year, so I thought it was a little early for that. But, we found some cute boucey balls that are shaped like easter eggs. They are large enough that they aren't a choking hazard (although I wouldn't leave a child unsupervised with them) but they are small enough that Jonah can palm them easily. They came in packs of two, so I got four packs, making eight eggs. Then I found a small felt basket with a cute little chick on it. Perfect! An activity that Jonah will love, for just $5.

I decided yesterday to give it a try. I put all of the eggs into the basket and showed Jonah how to dump them out. Jonah pretty much already knows this game, because we play it all the time with other items. He clapped his hands and then put them back into the basket one by one, while we counted them. Then, he dumped them all back out again and clapped.

He explored them in other ways, as well. He threw them, of course, but was very surprised when they bounced. I think it kind of scared him. He also tried tasting one, but absolutely hated the texture on his tongue. He hid them all and then went back to find them, putting them again into the basket.

In the end, he went back to putting them in, and dumping them out. He could do an activity like this all day and not get tired of it!

Jonah and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day

Hello to all of my readers out there. This is Jonah. Mommy is taking the day off from blogging, so it's up to me to fulfill the duties to all of my fans.

You would not believe the day that I just had! First of all, I woke up in a strange place. It took me a while to remember that it was Gigi's and Papaw's house. I was scared, so I cried until Mommy came to get me for breakfast. Then she put me straight into the high chair after changing my diaper. All she gave me for breakast was cold cereal. Can you believe that? Just plain old kix! Where are my eggs? Where are my pancakes? I could see this day was getting off to a bumpy start.

Then, I'd barely finished eating my lousy breakast when she came and got me, and put me in the van. I was still in my pajamas! Mom had lost a screw, I think. I sat in the car for a really long time. At least mommy kept it nice and warm. She kept telling me we were going home. I just sat and sat, and then when we got out of the car, mom was right- we were home!

Then she put me straight into the high chair again and fed me lunch. I didn't even get to see my toys! But, I was hungry so I guess that was okay. Except then, she didn't let me play even after I ate. I had to go take a nap! She said I needed to take a nap because I hadn't taken one in the car. She said we still had a busy schedule today, and wished that I would cooperate. So I went right to bed and took a nap. I guess I was really sleepy.

Then Mommy woke me up just an hour later. She put nice clothes on me and put my fancy cloth diapers on me. I knew something was going on, because mommy only ever dresses me like this if we are going out somewhere. Straight back to the high chair I went. I just wanted to play with my toys! But she gave me yummy cereal bars for snack. Then right back into the car we went.

Where were we going this time? I decided to act up a bit, to let Mommy know that I wasn't happy. I just wanted to play! The car stopped for a long time, and I could tell Mommy was getting mad. She kept saying something about a big train being stopped, and we were going to be late. I didn't care about being late for whatever it was, I just wanted to get out of my carseat! So I took off my shoes and threw them. It seemed logical at the time! Since my shoes were off, I figured I might as well keep going, so my socks came off and I threw those into the back seat, and then my mittens, and then my hat. This train thing was taking a long time, and I needed something to do!

Finally, Mommy opened the car door. Guess where we were. Go on, just guess. The doctor's office. Of all the places she had to take me to, it had to be the doctor's office!!! Mommy was mad that I had taken all of my things off and thrown them. If I knew where we were going, I would have hid them all better.

The doctor was no fun at all, let me tell you! She put that metal thing on my chest and wouldn't even let me pull it. Then she stuck a stick in my mouth and poked at my teeth! Then she stuck something in my ear, and my ear was owie! I screamed and screamed, and all Mommy did was hold my hands and tell me that it's okay. But it wasn't okay! I did not like the doctor today at all! Then Mommy talked to the doctor for a very long time. I just wanted to go play. Mommy wasn't listening to me, so I yelled even louder so she'd get the point. Then I pulled all of the paper off of the table I was sitting on. I made a big mess, and I was happy about that! Finally, the doctor left and mommy got me dressed. But the nurse came back in and Mommy laid me down on the table. I knew exactly what that meant! That nurse gives me needles, and needles are owie! I didn't want them, so I started to scream. They gave them to me anyway, and Mommy just let that nurse do it! She gave me a lollypop, but I was mad at her until we left that place.

And then Mommy had to go and get needles, too! At least she knows how it feels. Mommy's needles took a long time, but since I was mad at her I just sat in my stroller and read my book. I didn't even give her hugs and kisses when she was done. I was still mad.

Finally we got in the car. We're going home! But when Mommy opened the door this time, we were at the medicine place. We weren't home. Mommy put me in a shopping cart and went to talk to a lady about some medicine. Mommy told me that my ear needed medicine, and when we got it, we would go home. But the medicine place isn't just for medicine, they have all kinds of stuff there. Shoes and clothes and food and toys. Mommy made me go and try on shoes. I did not want to do it! I wouldn't let her put them on my feet. I was getting really irritated by now! Finally Mommy went and got the medicine for my ear and we went back into the car. The sun was going to bed already, and I still hadn't gotten to play at all! I was getting very angry. I decided to let Mommy know it. I knew we had to be pretty close to home, but I didn't care. I screamed as loud as I could. I yelled and yelled and I let my Mommy know that there is only so much that a little guy can take before he flies off the handle, and I was at my point! Mommy got upset and started saying some bad words at the car in front of us. I just kept screaming. I wanted everyone to know how mad I was!

Finally, Mommy took me home and let me play with my toys. Daddy was home, and I told him what happened, but he seemed to be on Mommy's side.

So Mommy, can we have a better day tomorrow? I'm thinking that sitting around the house and watching basketball on TV sounds like a good plan.

editor's note: Dear son, all of us have days when we wish that we could just wake up and start the day over. Such is life, but we must embrace the good days with the bad days knowing that the universe is unfolding as it should. And no, we will not be watching basketball tomorrow.

Early Interventions: The Ball is Rolling

I'm keeping this short and sweet, as I've brought myself to be very matter-of-fact about this whole situation we're finding ourselves in. I think it's kind of an emotional defense system. You have to be matter-of-fact in order to do what needs to be done. Otherwise, you could spend hours dwelling on it and start to become negative and bitter over it... or defensive about it. None of these attitudes would be helpful to us or to Jonah, so at this point we are just doing what we can about what we know.

Early Interventions called last week with the official results of his panel evaluation. It was basically what I was told immediately following the eval, but with a more official tone. Jonah has severe delays in gross motor, and expressive language. He is also delayed in his self help skills and social interactions, but not as severely.

He will be going to the group occupational therapy once a week, and we will be finding a personal speech therapist. The center does not offer individual speech therapy, so we will be going through his pediatrician to get a referral for the speech therapy. He will also be referred to an ENT to see if there is any medical reason that grunting and growling are his prominent vocalizations.

I'm not sure that the ENT will be able to help us. Exactly a year ago, Jonah was hospitalized as a case of failure to thrive. The staff immediately noticed his grunting and growling, and ran a series of tests on his throat, vocal chords, digestive system, and soft palette. They found no medical reason for him making these sounds, other than his reflux. They thought he was making them as an attempt to keep his food down, or to cope with the pain in his esophagus. Maybe the ENT can shed some light on this for us. My hopes are yes, he/she can; but my realistic thinking is probably not.

We are going to write his IEP and list of goals this Thursday. While I would love to make goals such as "walking independently and efficiently" and "calling me Mommy again." I know that the goals are going to have to be much smaller- "standing with balance for three seconds" and "consistently making the mmmm, bababa, and gagaga sounds" will probably be more like it.

After the goals and IEP are written, Jonah will be enrolled ASAP into their occupational therapy program. I was surprised by how quickly they will be able to get Jonah into the program. He will be starting it this coming Monday. I am greatful that they are able to get Jonah help so quickly, but also a little concerned that the reason he got in so fast is because the nurse felt that he was an "urgent case."

We will be revisiting the PDD-NOS possibility at the meeting this Thursday, but the nurse said that for now it would be best to treat the individual delays, keep testing him for PDD and keep a big eye on it, but not to actually call it that yet. PDD can accurately be predicted at this young age, but can't accurately be diagnosed until later in toddlerhood.

Other than this, we are just taking things one step at a time. And adding more and more specialists to our ever-growing list.

First Haircut

Before I became a parent, I swore that my child would not be "that" child who had what I call muppet hair. Especially if my child is a boy. We've all seen kids with muppet hair. The fine, whispy, feathery hair that won't lay flat. The kind that goes in every direction, and always seems to make it into the eyes, face and ears.

My boy is NEVER going to have hair like that. As soon as it gets too long, it's getting cut!

Well.... several years and one (and three quarters) children later, I present to you:Muppet Mullet!!!!!

And la pièce de résistance:
Why yes, that is my SON'S beautiful full head of hair.

I got mixed reactions to Jonah's lovely locks. Some people admired them. Other mothers agreed that I should wait until it was bugging him to cut it. After all, those baby curls never grow back. Still others said it was time for me to part with them. One mother in our playgroup went so far as to tell me that I have my girl coming, I will have all the blonde curls I want with her but to let my son look like a boy.

I cherished his long curls, however. They were so soft, when he'd come for me to give him a hug I loved putting my fingers into them. I loved washing his hair, lathering it up, singing him our little bath song as I did so. I loved his curls.

But, while running errands one day a few weeks ago, I came to the conclusion that no one, and I mean NO one, could tell that my baby was a boy. Even when he was dressed in VERY boyish clothes. It started at the doctor's office. We were going in just to make sure that Jonah was healthy before going on vacation. He was teething, and that often leads to an ear infection, so I wanted to make sure all was clear before we went on an airplane. As we went back, the nurse who had just called his name, and was looking at his chart that SAYS he is a boy, said "What's the matter with the princess today?" Honestly, I've never met a girl named "Jonah" before.... Then the store clerk at Target. Then the cashiers at Giant Eagle and Petsmart. My little boy looked like a princess. It was then that I realized that my child had muppet hair. It was time to cut it. My baby needed to lose his curls!

Daryl's mom cuts all of her boys' hair. Even now that they are grown men, they go to their mother for their hair cuts. I was really nervous about taking Jonah to a salon or a barber, because what if we got someone who wasn't used to cutting a baby's hair? Would they be patient with Jonah? Would they know how to get him to sit still? Would they be careless and cut him? There was a children's hair salon, where they only cut kids' hair under thirteen years old. I called to get an appointment only to find out that they went out of business that very week. Daryl's mother kindly offered to cut Jonah's hair that evening. I don't know why I hadn't thought of it before, because who would be more patient, caring, and attentive than his own grandmother. So that night, out came Grandma's haircutting kit.
We gave him a candy cane that was left over from the holidays, and a small toy that has buttons he likes to push. For the front and sides, he sat in his high chair, and that worked perfectly. But when she got to the very back, she couldn't get the scissors between his head and the chair back, so I held him in my lap for the very end. He was very well behaved for this experience, much to our surprise! He even let Grandma use the shaver to style and shape it.

I am overall very happy with Jonah's new look. His hair isn't in his face all the time anymore, and it was getting hard to wash all that hair on a toddler who won't stop (especially in the tub!) It's also easier to clean his ears out, because his hair is no longer falling in the way!And of course, I saved some of those precious curls for his baby book:

A New Kind of "Normal"

I am taking my time writing this post. Ethically speaking, I have debated about whether or not I should even write it at all. One reason being that I don't want to prematurely label my son, but the biggest reason being that I don't want others to prematurely label him. I want to stress here the importance of remembering that nothing has been found for certain, and until next week testing for the most part needs to be considered as inconclusive yet needing more exploration.

Yet even though I felt so negatively about writing this post, I know there are other mothers out there who are going through this, who will go through this, or who have gone through this. I want to contribute to the community of families that are having this experience and offer support, and even hopefully gain support by doing so. Throughout our journey as parents, Daryl and I have hit a lot of really hard places. I think this is one of the toughest places to be in as a parent.

A few weeks ago, I posted about Jonah's screening with Early Interventions. The nurse concluded that he was delayed in several areas of development, and needed to be evaluated by a panel of specialists to see if the Early Interventions program could help him with these delays. At the evaluation, the panel consisted of an audiologist, a speech therapist, a developmental specialist, an occupational therapist, the director of Early Interventions, and the nurse who had done the initial screening.

They asked him to do several things. Point to his body parts, follow simple commands, react to different tones of voice, react to different facial expressions, and different motor skills. They also continued to ask me more questions than I can remember. The nurse brought a worksheet for me that asked different questions about Jonah. I had filled one out when she had done the initial screening, but she said this one was more in depth and they have seen some red flags for a pervasive developmental disorder. Many people do not know what this means, but having gone to school for cognitive psychology and taken several classes in cognitive assessment myself, I knew. They were softening the prospect of the diagnosis by calling it this long name. In short, PDD is a category of disorders that includes autism and autistic features. When someone speaks of "being on the spectrum" they are referring to the class of disorders that is PDD. The nurse didn't know that I know what PDD is. She didn't know that my heart fell to the floor. I filled out the worksheet, but could only fill out up to the 12 month mark. He could only be tested up to the twelve month level, because he will not be eighteen months until next week. They looked over the sheets, compared notes. I saw a lot of head nodding, a lot of concerned looks, and a lot of whispering. The nurse came back to me and told me that we should bring him back to complete the testing when he is eighteen months old. If they do it a day too early, then the test is invalid. She also explained to me that there is an autism and PDD specialist that comes to their center every month from Columbus, and they will most likely recommend that I bring Jonah in to see him.

She said if Jonah does have a form of PDD, it is PDD Not Otherwise Specified (PDD-NOS.) This means that a child shows some similarities to a child who has autism, but is more social and has the cognitive capacity to process certain situations that a child who has autism may not. Children with PDD-NOS often do not use language very well, and seem to lose certain language skills over the course of their development. They might have problems with motor skills such as walking. But they are typically aware of their environment and respond to people who engage them. Jonah is a little confusing to the specialists, because while he does have some tendencies, he is also pretty social.

I have noted other signs with Jonah, such as repetetive actions, sometimes seeming like he has a hearing problem, waving and using other gestures inappropriately. While it is normal for a child to throw objects, Jonah does it to an excess, as if it were an impulse.

I may be paranoid now, noting every little thing that could point to PDD-NOS. But really I am just a worried mother, who wants her little boy to have the best chance at being happy and healthy. I am very upset by the thought that he will have to go through this testing. I know that there are a lot of people who like drama and attention, and they *want* something to always be wrong. I am hoping with all of my heart that we go in for this testing and PDD-NOS is ruled out, or any other diagnosis that falls under PDD. But it is still a process that we are going through at this time, and it is weighing very heavily on our family. If we have him tested and it turns out that there is something wrong, we can get him the proper therapies that he needs now to avoid further delays and other problems. At the same time, we feel like terrible parents for even thinking that our child is autistic or has autistic tendencies. I used to wonder how parents could ignore things that were so obviously wrong with their child, but now as a parent I can see how that is an appealing option. To just say "it will come, he'll do it when he's ready." I want to be sitting here right now, writing a post about how normal Jonah is. But the truth of the matter is that he isn't normal. Even strangers notice that he isn't normal.

In the end, however, no matter what the testing shows, we know that he is normal for Jonah. We will most likely need to make some adjustments in our lives, no matter what we find from these tests. But we cannot compare Jonah's "normal" to another eighteen month olds' "normal." I was pretty much told by the team that we will be back to the centers for therapies. Most likely speech therapy and occupational therapy for his walking. While this may not be another eighteen month olds' normal, it is certainly going to become ours, and we will embrace it along with everything else that we have encountered on our journey down the path of parenthood.

Vacation in Arizona: Midweek check-in

Last month, my mother-in-law announced to me that neither her husband nor her best friend could accompany her on her annual trip to Scottsdale Arizona. She suggested that because she would rather not travel alone, that perhaps it would be "fun" for Jonah and me to tag along. And so here we are, in sunny Scottsdale Az, halfway through our vacation.

As usual with a one year old (and a mother-in-law) getting here was half the battle. The flight was nearly four hours long, which isn't terrible but also not a walk in the park. Jonah is at that wonderful age when he wants to explore every new thing. Airports and airplanes are no exception. He did well while he was in the carrier, waving to everyone and watching all of the happenings. When we got to our gate, I wanted to change his diaper and let him move around a bit. He loved looking out the windows at all of the vehicles on the runway (okay, I know that part isn't the runway, but I forget the technical term.)
He was so angry when they called boarding for our flight, that I ended up having to carry him upside down through the gate! He was trying to climb out of my arms, back to the window. The rest of the flight was pretty typical. He slept for about twenty minutes, until the flight attendant decided that a good place to scoop ice would be right next to a sleeping toddler's head. My mother in law found that doritos do not make an ideal snack for a toddler on an airplane (we both ended up covered in neon orange goo) and markers are a definite "no" for an activity. Her intentions were good, but I had to wonder about her logic on this one, since there were also crayons at the ready (which would have been a much better option.)

Despite gloomy forcasts, the weather here has been absolutely gorgeous. While I, having grown up in Ohio, think that it's been perfect weather for the swimming pool, short sleeve shirts, and capri pants, my mother in law (who grew up in Utah) has been wearing sweaters and complaining about the "cold." This is summer weather for me, at nearly 70 F and sunny!

It was so beautiful on Teusday that we decided to hit the outdoor activities. We headed about a half hour north for the Phoenix Zoo and the Desert Botanical Gardens. Because we are Toledo Zoo members, we got into this amazing zoo for half price! I was very excited to take Jonah here, because it is rated as one of the top five zoos for children in the country. The exhibits are amazing, and Jonah had such a great time. I think everyone's favorite was the Giraffe Encounter. For just $3 per adult, you can spend a few minutes with the giraffes, and even get to feed one! As the Toledo Zoo has a similar experioence for $45, we felt that this was a great deal. The giraffes were amazing! I've never seen one this close before.

Another favorite was the spider monkeys exhibit. This really was more like an experience than an exhibit. They had a pathway for visitors to walk through the monkeys' habitat, with ropes hanging above. You could literally get face to face with these amazing little creatures. There was also a childrens' area that had an American Farm theme. It was sponsored by Fisher Price. There was a playground that looked like the Little People farm set, and a snack shack that had healthy meal options (we discovered this after eating a complete lunch that consisted of junk food from the main food plaza.) There was a fake cow that children could milk, and a tractor to sit on and "drive." Jonah loved both of these activities. He wasn't sure that he liked getting the water on his hands when he milked the cow (yes, water came out when you milked the udders properly!) but he still seemed to enjoy it as long as he could wipe his hands off after each squeeze. But his absolute favorite activity in this area was brushing the goats. I cannot wait for him to walk, because I think that he would enjoy things like that even better with a little more independence.

While walking to the zoo exit and making a quick stop at the souvenier shop, Jonah took a pretty good nap in the stroller. He wore himself out! It took us about 45 minutes to get from the childrens' area to the car, so he had a good doze and was ready to go again by the time we got him in his carseat. Just a quick drive around the corner was the Desert Botanical Gardens.

While we only dedicated a couple hours to the gardens, it could definitely take a few days of exploring to see everything there. I had never seen a cactus before, and was awed by all of the varieties that could be viewed here. I have seen the tiny cacti that grew in the area of Texas that I lived in for a couple of years, but nothing like what they had here at the botanical gardens!

The rest of the vacation has been pretty low-key. Yesterday we took a silver jewelery making class here at the resort where we are staying, and Jonah and I have been spending a lot of time outdoors, enjoying the sunshine. Jonah has discovered the joys of playground slides, and is really enjoying being able to have free reign outside. I'm hoping to get him down to the pool area where they have a fountain for the children to play in, despite my mother in law insisting that it is too cold! It will certainly be hard to get off the plane in Detroit this Sunday, and face the winter weather once again.