A Community in Grieving

(Warning for sensitive content. School shooting and funerals discussed; offensive language used)



What can I say about today? Today I drove through a town, which is usually the source of pleasure for me and my family. A trip to Chardon Ohio has always meant apple picking, a trip to get fresh eggs or honey. It's an idyllic northeast Ohio town, just north to where I grew up.

Today however, the apple orchards were lined with trees adorned with black and red ribbons. Signs with hearts were scattered across yards. My car navigated the winding roads, passing makeshift memorials and home made tributes. The site of the town, which usually makes me smile, brought me to tears. Such pain today. Such loss.

I parked my car on Main Street and continued to walk the rest of the way to the church. Teenagers wept openly in the streets. Mothers held their babies a little more protectively than usual. In a town where you could walk the streets for hours and not see a cop, I lost track of how many patrols I encountered. I was attending the funeral for two reasons. The first reason was, like everyone else, I had an amazing sense of grief regarding the events that took place in the beginning of the week. I had to let go of my anger, my sadness over the senseless loss of life so young. I had to join the group in letting the community know they were not alone in their grief.

On Monday February 27th, the unthinkable happened in Chardon. Mothers and fathers dropped their children off at the high school. They probably discussed the after school schedule for the day, whether or not lunches were forgotten. Maybe they talked about grades, or choice in clothes and music. Maybe they remained silent. Some of the families said good bye to their students either at home or in the school parking lot, and it was the last time they saw their child alive. Moments later, before classes began, a boy opened fire in the cafeteria. Three students were fatally wounded. One remains in serious condition and another has just been released from the hospital.

As a mother, I had to stand with this community so close to home. I cannot begin to fathom dropping my child off at school, and an hour later learning that he is dead. It is a thought that is too immense for my soul and heart.

But a second reason that sealed my decision for going was a tweet made by the infamous Westboro Baptist "Church." They declared that they would be picketing the funeral. For those of you that are unaware of the WBC, just imagine the most vulgar, inappropriate, despicable person that you possibly can. They frequently picket the funerals of victims of acts of violence, or soldiers. They spit on people entering the funeral. They call those mourning the dead "Fags, cunts, sluts, queer, dykes." Yes, I typed every one of those hateful words, because I want to share with you how low the members of this hate group are. They call a mother burying her child a slut and a whore, as she is mourning. A mother who did nothing. To say they call names is not descriptive enough to depict their black souls. And they were threatening to come to MY corner of Ohio. MY turf. Well let me tell you, Westboro Baptist Hate Group: There is no tolerance for you here.

And so I joined the hundreds of people, who out of love and support, went to lift the family up during this difficult time. We stood, surrounding the church, so that we would bear the hate slurs, the spitting, the obnoxious signs, rather than those trying to say goodbye to a son, friend, and student. We stood to show those in mourning that for every hateful soul, there are a hundred people with compassion in their hearts, ready to walk down the road of grief with them. Compassion and love won. I will not say any more about the Westboro Baptist Hate Group, other than they did not show up. Rumors, including word from a police officer, were spreading that they had been in the area, but left without sounding off at all. This was the best case scenario for us. The community was surrounded by nothing but love and solidarity.

The line of support for the victim's family went on as far as one could see

As ten o'clock neared and everyone in the crowd was suffering from frozen toes and shaky knees from the cold, the motorcade arrived. I was amongst a group of students who did not feel they were emotionally prepared to be inside the church, but wanted to pay their respects. Upon seeing the hearse, a young girl standing next to me burst out in tears. "I just don't know why!?" she sobbed. I put my hand gently on her back. "We're here with you." I softly said. The woman to her other side placed her hand next to mine "We're all here with you." She reiterated. The girl calmed and we hugged. She said "That was all I needed; I'm ready to go home now. I don't know who you are, but I love you for coming." We hugged again briefly and she broke away from the group, walking toward her home, still sobbing slightly.

And that is all that I can really say about today. As everyone finds a new normal, as parents regain the courage to say good bye to their children in the morning, as students battle the grief of losing friends, of being in a place where suddenly they were threatened, as we all find our footing on this path that has been laid out- Chardon, we are with you crying, and we are with you healing. We are all with you.

Happy Birthday to an Icon

One of my heroes while growing up was, and always will be, Theodor Seuss Geisel. He was of course better known by his children's book pen names Dr. Seuss and Theo LeSieg. On Friday, March 2nd, would have been the late children's author's 108th birthday. This date has also been reserved as "National Read Across America Day" during which many communities are holding read-a-thons and attempts to break records for reading related events.

I had wanted to share with you a whole week of activities that I have planned to celebrate my favorite author. Unfortunately, my ancient laptop has finally bit the dust and my computer access is highly limited at the moment. So for now, I will share with you some of the ideas that I have planned. I will make my best attempt to post our personal experiences with the activities through the week. I have categorized the activities with the books that they go with. A good starting point, before you jump right into these, would be to check out the websites:
http://littlekinderwarriors.blogspot.com/2011/03/read-across-america-dr-seuss.html
http://www.seussville.com/#/home
http://www.seussville.com/activities/RAAEducKit_ActGuide_WEB.pdf
and
http://www.seussville.com/loraxproject/ (I will refer to this further on in the post!)
Oh the Places You'll Go
~Discuss different jobs that your child could have when they grow up. Glue a paper doll die cut to a piece of paper and have your child decorate it as what they would like to be or do.  
~Make a balloon wall! Cut balloon shapes out of construction paper and have your child look through magazines to find pictures of things they would like to see or places they would like to go. Help them cut out the pictures and paste them to the balloons collage style, and hang them on a wall where they can look at it and be proud

The Butter Battle Book (my personal favorite) AND/OR The Sneetches
~Use multicultural paper doll die cuts to discuss how some cultures are different and do things in a different way. Have your child decorate the dolls using different materials. Then emphasize that even though we do things differently, and might look different sometimes, we all do things that are similar too! We all eat, sleep, play games, love our mommies, feel sad sometimes and angry sometimes. If you feel it is appropriate, discuss including everyone in games, even if they are different.

Cat in the Hat
Okay, so what would a week of celebrating Dr. Seuss be without giving a nod to this beloved book?
~Play a rhyming game. Look at some of the words in the book and see how many rhyming words you can come up with
~Make rhyming cubes. I haven't worked the details out on this one, but my plan is to make paper cubes, oragami style, and use a sharpie to write letters on each side of the cube. The child can then build a word using the cubes, and flip the first cube onto different sides to make a different word that rhymes with the original.
~ Pin the Hat on the Cat. Use a computer to print a large picture of the Cat minus his hat. If you are artistic like I am not, you can always free hand it onto posterboard as well! Make a hat or two and use two sided tape or single sided tape looped over to make the back sticky (or if you want a version that will last, you could use felt and velcro!) Play the game as you would pin the tail on the donkey
~Cat Hats. Cut a middle out of a paper plate, so you have an open circular strip. Help your child use construction paper to make a white and red top hat. You might want to make the top hat shape, and allow your child to paste the colored stripes on. If you want to do something different, offer a variety of colors! Staple the hat to the middle of the paper plate strip. Use a paper hole punch to punch holes in the ends of the plate and tie string to it, to help you size the hat to your child.


Yertle the Turtle
~Make several turtle "blocks" out of shoe boxes, tissue boxes, small packaging boxes (the kind you might get from Amazon etc) Use green construction paper to cover the box. Allow your child to help decorate the "shells" and cover with clear contact paper to add durability. Make turtle heads, arms, legs, and tails from different shades of green and brown paper. Cut them out and laminate them. Hot glue them to the boxes to make the turtles. Have fun making your stack of turtles as tall as you can! Have your child count as you stack together! It is more fun if the turtles are several different sizes.
~ Paper Plate Turtles. Place a paper plate in front of your child right side up. Help them cut and paste turtle arms, legs, a head, and a tail, to the edges of this plate facing up, or you can create the turtle parts yourself and have the child place them if they are younger. Place a second paper plate over top of this one, bottom side up, and staple the plates together. Older children can paper mache the "shell" and paint it, and younger children can use geometric self adhesive "foamies" to decorate their shells. Add some dried rice or beans to the plate before stapling them together if you would like to make this into a musical instrument

My Many Colored Days
~Color Felt Board. Create different colored felt items for your felt board. If you don't think you could have one, trust me it is easy! Cover a piece of poster board with a large piece of felt. Put it into a cheap off the shelf frame from a craft store. Voila, felt board! For this activity, create items in groups similar to color. A strawberry, a red shoe, a red flower etc. Then do the same for other colors- a blue crayon, a blue bird etc. Encourage your child to sort the items into different colors on the felt board. Really all you need is felt (found at a craft store) some scissors, and a glue gun.
~Feeling Faces. Use a few blank sheets of paper to draw the outline of a face. Ask your child to draw a sad face, a happy face, etc. Label each face with what emotion it is. Use clear contact paper to laminate the pictures, and bind them together with a loose binder ring (found at office supply stores.) Use the book your child made to discuss emotions and what to do when he is feeling sad, angry, happy etc.
~Feeling Magnet Board. This is something else a lot of people think they don't have the resources to have in their playroom. If you have a cookie sheet, you have a magnet board! Or if you want a fancy one, you could buy a piece of sheet metal from a home improvement store and frame it similar to the felt board above! At office supply stores you can usually find magnetic business card sheets for printers. Use those and construction paper to create facial features in different emotions. A smily face, angry eyes,sleepy eyes, a few different noses. Let your child make up their own faces! (Tip- you can use the computer to help with the creation of your facial features!!!)

The Lorax
Okay, yeah I'm getting on the Lorax train. Quite frankly, I'm pretty pumped about the movie that will debut on Dr. Seuss's birthday. Yes, I will attempt to take my children to see it, since Jonah has no school on Friday. It will be their first theater movie, so we'll see how much of it we get to enjoy!
~Talk about things we can do every day to "save the earth." Include the children in separating recycling, turning out the lights and electronics, switch to dish cloths and rags for the day instead of using paper towels. Depending on the age of the child, there are a lot of activities. Do a little online searching for kid-friendly eco activities!
~ Go to the Lorax Project website I have listed above. Click on "Info" and a list of places that need help are listed. Choose a place and explore it. Do an internet search with your child to find pictures of animals or plants in these areas that are endagered because of humans. Have your child draw a picture of the animal. Talk about ways that you can help. Talk about things that you might already be doing.

Bartholemew and the Oobleck 
~Make your own oobleck! Help your child pour some corn starch into a mixing bowl. Add water while stirring until you have a thick liquidy, but not watery, substance. Notice that it spreads out and acts like a liquid when you are not touching it, but if you poke it hard or try to throw a bit of it down, it acts as a solid! Even if your child is too little to understand all of that, they will still have fun playing with this stuff! To dispose, scrape as much as you can into the trash can, and then rinse the bowl. It will clean up with water from the table!  


The Birthday Bash:
On Friday we are going to have a Dr. Seuss birthday party. We will start the day with real green eggs and ham. I will let the kids help dye the eggs. (although in the book, they are pictured as sunny side up eggs with green yolks- I still haven't figured out a way to replicate this, so my kids get green scrambled eggs, with cubed ham in them)

We will then play our Pin the Hat on the Cat game and make our Cat Hats before reading our pledged 20 minutes together and having lunch. I am not completely decided on lunch yet, but I would like to somehow fashion the Cat in the Hat's head and hat out of sandwich stuffs. Tomatoes and ham for the hat stripes, cheese and olives for the face. It is still a thought in progress. But lunch will definitely include a one fish two fish jello dessert! Then we will be heading out to the movies, sporting our newly made Cat Hats.

That is the plan, anyway! I'll try my hardest to post the details of how certain activities went!

Are you planning to do anything special for Dr. Seuss's birthday? Leave a comment and let us know what!

Encouraging Children to Explore The World

 It's no secret that I love to travel. My bucket list is speckled with places to see and things that I want to do thousands of miles away. The appeal that travel has on me stems from the fact that there are so many amazing things in this world; cultures rich with history; plants, animals, and people, all waiting to tell a story. I have always known that I wanted to instill this curiosity about the world into my children, but how do we go about it with children so young?

This past week, we have been on vacation with my husband's family, in a place that is very different from where we live. Although Arizona, at first thought, may not seem like such a different culture from Ohio- after all, it is a relatively short plane ride away, in the same country, with the same chain restaurants and big box stores- Daryl and I took this opportunity to focus on the rich cultural diversities that we can find right here in our native country. When it comes to the landscape, Arizona is noticeably different for the children. Jonah literally thought that our plane had landed on another planet. Of course to a three year old, "Phoenix" sounds an awful lot like "Venus."

While commuting, we pointed out the mountains, the buttes, the desert ground and plants that were strange to us, things that we just don't see in our little corner of Ohio. We met with a family that Daryl knew from college and encouraged the children to play and talk to their children; they met the family chickens and played games that their friends don't play back home.

We also chose activities and destinations that encouraged them to learn about things different from what we know at home. We fed a giraffe at the zoo, and came nearly nose to nose with monkeys (while these creatures are not a part of Arizona wildlife, these are still experiences we cannot gain at home.)

We got up close and personal (but not TOO close) to desert wildlife and plants at the desert botanical gardens. We learned about cacti.

We met a ground squirrel.

We said hello to a cactus dwelling bird.

We even met some friends that were familiar.

I encouraged them (unsuccessfully) to try foods that had culinary roots from nearby Mexico, and fruits and veggies that were grown local to the area where we were staying, although we also had familiar comfort foods available in our kitchen at the resort. And above all, they were encouraged to just be kids and have fun!

I know they will never remember the specifics. They will not remember the names of the animals, they will not remember seeing a cactus, they will not remember looking at a mountain in the distance and shouting "A volcano!!! YIKES!" But what I hope they are beginning to develop that will stick with them throughout their lifetime, is a sense of wonder and curiosity about how people live and why cultures behave a certain way; I hope that the seeds have been planted that will grow into a drive to explore a world full of interesting stories and places. And I hope that this curiosity and drive will foster a life of compassion and understanding for cultures and individuals that are a bit different from what we have grown used to in Ohio.

"Chocolate-Covered Strawberry" Oatmeal Pancakes

Valentine's Day occurred in our house a few days late because of our vacation to Arizona. It crossed my mind to pack everything up and take it with us to create a fun day for the kids, but we decided to pack very lightly and all of our pink, red, and heart shaped items were left at home. I wasn't going to let the kids miss out on their day of fun special treats, though! They don't know that the rest of the world celebrated love and romance nearly a week ago! My favorite part of the day is probably breakfast, because the kids are always so delighted to find heart shapes somewhere on their plate! The oatmeal in these pancakes make them a little more hearty (pun intended) than regular pancakes, and also replaces wheat flour and sugar in the overall volume of pancake that you are eating. The chocolate chips are optional; I thought I'd throw them in as a special treat on a holiday!

1 batch of your favorite pancake batter
1/4 cup of skim milk
1-2 cups quick oats
2 cups frozen strawberries, mostly thawed and chopped coarsely
about 1 cup chocolate chips

Prepare your favorite pancake batter or mix. Add in the extra milk, oats, and strawberries. Mix until well incorporated, with 3-5 strokes of your spoon. Do not over mix the batter, it may be lumpy, just be sure that the oats and strawberries are evenly distributed.

Heat a frying pan or griddle over medium-low heat until a pat of butter or drop of water "dances" on it. Butter the cooking surface well. Use cooking spray or butter to lubricate the sides of  metal heart shaped cookie cutters. Place a metal heart shaped cookie cutter on the cooking surface and use a spoon to place batter within the cookie cutter, making sure that batter covers all corners. Drop a few chocolate chips evenly throughout the surface of the batter. When the top of the batter appears "play dough-ish" and bubbly, use tongs to hold the cookie cutter as you push the shape out gently with a butter knife. Use caution here, the cookie cutter will be HOT! Once the shape is out of the cookie cutter, use a spatula to flip it over. Cook for another minute or so, until the bottom of the shape is slightly browned and the chocolate chips are melted. You may need to use the butter knife to trim any stray batter.

You can also use this method to cook eggs into heart shapes, but Jonah has been asking for pancakes for breakfast all week.

Swim!

In an attempt to keep the kids active during the winter, we signed them up for parent-child swim lessons. We are very fortunate that the area we moved to has a wonderful recreational department, and we plan to fully take advantage of it!

Swimming started last week, twice a week for forty minutes per session. The lessons were listed as two separate classes, however ages 0-3 were all put into the same group once we got there. This has advantages and disadvantages for our family. I was disappointed at first, because I was hoping that Jonah would learn basic skills such as floating, kicking, and putting his face in the water. I think that the older children in the class are not getting age appropriate water skills. However, since both kids are in the same class, Daryl and I can spend that time with the kids as a family. Although the sessions are basically just water play, the "instructor" goes between each parent-child couple to give suggestions on ways to strengthen certain skills.

Jonah loves to float on his back, holding a "noodle," and he loves chasing balls through the water. Evie is working on building confidence in the water, and not being afraid. She loves blowing bubbles and kicking!

These swim lessons are not only a great way for our family to spend evenings exercising together; they are offering a great outlet for the kids' energies, exposing them to new experiences, and providing wonderful sensory activities. I am hoping that these classes will evolve to teach them knowledge of water safety and potentially life saving skills of swimming and floating.

So although the temperatures are still chilly, just look for my family pool side!

Turkey Noodle Soup

Home made soup is the perfect dinner for a day like today! Last week, I roasted one of the turkeys that I got on sale after Thanksgiving. The turkey has provided us with meals for a week, and only cost $13. Today, I had just enough turkey left for this soup, and frozen turkey stock that I had made from a previous turkey. Measurements are estimated, especially the herbs and spices. Please adjust the recipe to your taste! You can also add celery and onions with the carrots; I just didn't have any today!

Turkey Noodle Soup:
8 cups turkey stock (or chicken stock)
3 carrots, peeled and sliced
1 1/2 cups-2 cups diced or shredded turkey
2 cups bowtie pasta (or whatever your shape preference)
1 tablespoon dried parsely (fresh would also be nice)
2 tsp  ground marjoram
2 tsp ground oregano
1 tsp garlic powder
1 tsp celery seed
1/2 tsp ground mustard
salt and pepper to taste
2 tablespoons butter
1 tablespoon extra virgin olive oil

In a stock pot, heat the oil and butter until butter is melted and the oil begins to shimmer. Add the carrots to the butter and oil; stir to coat them in oil as you add the herbs and spices, saving the salt. Heat the carrots, stirring often, until they are slightly tender. Add the stock  to the pot and bring to a boil over high heat. Reduce the heat to medium-high and add the pasta. Just before the pasta is finished cooking, add the turkey and salt. Boil until the pasta and carrots are tender.

I also added 1/4 cup of turkey fat from the pan that I had baked the turkey in, at the same time that I added the meat, and allowed it to melt into the stock. I think this really gave the soup a great boost in flavor. It was served with slices of home made bread.

Snowed In Fun: Indoor Snowball Fight

Jonah has been asking since October, to have a snowball fight. He wants to go sledding, build a snowman, go ice skating, and above all: have a snowball fight.

The problem is, we haven't had much snow this year. In November we were able to go outside and enjoy a light dusting; other than that, the only snow we have gotten has been in conjunction with temperatures in the teens. It is followed by warm weather which immediately reduces the beautiful snow into muddy slushy sludge.

So now that the snow is falling heavily outside of our window, and little voices are asking to go out, what do I do considering that it is 18 degrees F?

We have a snowball fight, of course! One that requires no gloves, no bulky coat that restricts movement, and it provides gross motor opportunities as well as tactile sensory integration!

Over the summer, I picked up some shower loofahs at the dollar store, 4 for $1. I bought twelve of them, specifically for this activity, so I made sure that they were at least partially white (they had no all-white loofahs.)

I did not show the loofahs to the kids, but instead, played up the idea that we are going to have a "snowball fight." I asked them if they wanted to have a snowball fight INside, because it was too cold to go OUTside. Of course the idea thrilled them. I brought them up to our play area, which is a nice spacious area with very little that can be knocked over or broken. If you do this in your living room, please remove any lamps, knick knacks, or pictures that could be broken.

I dumped the bag of "snowballs" onto the floor. The kids stared at me. They had no idea what to do with them! So I picked one up and (nicely) chucked it at Jonah's chest. "AAAHHHHH!!! I got YOU!!! Can you get ME???" Then the kids understood, and suddenly I was "under fire" being pelted with pretend snowballs. I ducked for cover under the train table. The kids giggled, waiting for me to come out. I grabbed the closest snowball I saw, leaped up and yelled "AAAAAHHHHH!!!!!" They squeeled and ran from me. Jonah, hiding behind a small brick structure on the wall, and Eve under the blankets on the futon.

We went back and forth in this way until I was too tired to continue. Everyone got a fair amount of exercise.The loofahs are one of the textures that Jonah is hesitant to touch, so I left the string loops on them, so he would have something to hold them with, but I also encouraged him to hold the whole loofah in order to aim and throw it properly.

This activity is great to get the wiggles out of any aged child. It promotes exercise, hand-eye coordination, social play, imaginative play, and tactile sensory integration. And the best part about it is, it does all of that without the kids even realizing that they are doing anything other than having a great time.